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Author Archives: Kathleen Silber
Extended Birth Family Matters
Question: We are hoping to not only build a wonderful relationship with our birthparents but also extended members of the birth family. What are some ideas adoptive parents have used to include the extended family into their lives? Answer: It’s great that you want to include other members of the birth family in your life. [...]
Posted in Adoptive Families
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Why Open Adoption Agreements?
Imagine that, in their excitement before the birth of the baby, adoptive parents tell the birthmother “Get in touch anytime.” They are thinking about receiving a few emails while she interprets “anytime” to mean monthly visits. These very different ideas about open adoption can cause anger and disappointment on both sides. It is scenarios like [...]
Posted in Adoptive Families, birthparents
Tagged birthparents, legal issues in adoption, open adoption
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Helping Your Extended Family Understand Open Adoption
Adopting parents frequently tell us that their extended family members are negative or anxious about the idea of an open adoption. How do you help them get on board? It’s important to remember that your parents are from a different generation where closed adoption and secrecy were the norm. In the past birthmothers were typically [...]
Posted in Adoptive Families
Tagged adoption fears, open adoption, open vs closed adoption
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Discussing Adoption with School Age Children
A child’s understanding of adoption increases during the school age years. Assuming that parents introduced the subject of adoption and talked openly about it (in a simple manner) during the pre-school years, now they can focus on the circumstances of why the birthparents made an adoption plan. As in the pre-school years, they should use [...]
Discussing Adoption with Pre-School Age Children
Pre-school age children do not yet have the capacity to understand adoption. However, there are several very important reasons for introducing the subject at this age: From the beginning, adoption should be a household word and subject that is discussed comfortably in the home. Talking openly about adoption aids in the adoptive parents’ comfort level [...]
Birthmother’s Day: May 8th, 2010
Birthmother’s Day is a celebration of the special role of birthmothers and the loving and unselfish decision they made on behalf of their children. Mother’s Day is painful for many birthmothers because it is a reminder of the loss they experienced in adoption. She is a birthmother but not a mom—the adoptive mother is the [...]