Waiting to Adopt: Planning a Welcome Home Celebration

Waiting to Adopt: Older Sibling Adoption Books

Waiting to Adopt: Baby Announcements

Waiting to Adopt: Preparing with Parenting and Adoption Books

Waiting to Adopt: Selecting Child Care Provider

Waiting to Adopt: Selecting a Pediatrician

Waiting to Adopt: Shop for Baby Furniture

Waiting to Adopt: Select A Name for Baby

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Letter From the Editor: The articles in this issue of Open Adoption are warm and inspiring, helping us welcome another holiday season. We celebrate IAC’s newest families on page one and announce holiday party dates and new staff on page two. The holiday season at IAC also includes our annual holiday break and Adoption Awareness Month and that is detailed on page two and 16 respectively.

On page three an adoptive mother writes a letter to her son, Jared, recounting the events that formed their family. On page four, we introduce Gia, and the series of events that brought her adoptive mothers and her birthmother together. Both stories reveal tiny details that lead to miraculous outcomes, and how fate plays a role in open adoption.

Our feature article is a birth story told from three perspectives. It’s not often that all sides of a story are told, but on page seven, the birth of Chloe Star is recounted by her adoptive mother, her birthmother, and her birthfather. Respect, admiration, and friendship are common themes in all three stories, proving the strength of their open relationship and the immense amount of love that brought Chloe into the world.

In our Staff Profile, you will meet Lauren Favorite, our Adoptive Parent Intake Coordinator in Atlanta, Georgia. Aside from welcoming perspective adoptive parents to the IAC, she has quite a few interesting hobbies. Learn about these hobbies and more on page 13.

On page 14, hear from resident expert Kathleen Silber as she addresses a unique situation your child may encounter in school. As always, the final pages contain up-to-date birthparent statistics and upcoming support group dates. Happy Holidays!

~ Ann Wrixon, MSW, MBA, Executive Director

IAC has also recently published detailed wait time statistics for 2006 through May 2011. This is discussed on page two. On page 10, we reveal a selection of comments pulled from our Facebook page that answer the question: “What is the significance of your child’s name? And/Or how did you decide upon a name for your child?” The answers from both adoptive parents and birthparents are touching and inspiring.

On page three, get to know Lyn Dawn, Manager of Agency Services. Learn about her love of animals, her feelings about family and what it’s like to be the IAC Halloween Decorating Champion 10 years in a row.

Turn to page four to read an endearing story of how Erin Garcia-Norris and her wife bonded with their son’s birthmother without being able to speak her native language. On page six is our feature article, by Jamie Clark, who has two daughters, both adopted through the IAC. She tells of her search to find her older daughter’s birthmother and how Facebook and other social media play an important role in their ongoing relationship.

On page nine, hear from resident expert Kathleen Silber as she offers great insight into how to teach your adopted child the significance of birth siblings. As always, the final pages contain up-to-date birthparent statistics and upcoming support group dates. DOWNLOAD & enjoy!

~ Ann Wrixon, Executive Director ~

• The average wait time from when a prospective adoptive family completes all of their pre-adoption paperwork and a child is placed in their home is 14 months.
• The median wait time is 11 months. (Half of families have a wait time less than 11 months, half wait more than 11 months)
• 70% of adoptive families have a placement within 18 months, 90% have a placement within 28 months.

See: http://www.adoptionhelp.org/adoption_statistics/

Furthermore, we provide details of the wait time for every family who adopted through the IAC over the last four and a half years. In addition, we provide a breakdown of wait times for Gay male families, Lesbian families, single parent families, and families with children.

See: http://www.adoptionhelp.org/adoption_statistics/graphs.html

Gay male families, Lesbian families and families with children wait an average of 14 months for an adoptive placement, which is the same as the wait time for all IAC families. Single parent families have an average wait of 15 months, but this statistic is based on just 21 single parent placements so may not be as representative as we would like.

More than 50% of families have a placement within 12 months. 70% have a placement within 18 months and 90% of families have a placement by 28 months.

Mostly, Ann hopes to communicate to families who want to adopt a newborn that they can do it! We hope you enjoy the video.

It is important, however, for LGBT families to work with agencies that do not discriminate or use unintentionally biased practices. For example, some agencies ask birthparents if they are open to LGBT or “non-traditional” families. There is no reason to ask this question. It implies that LGBT families are “different” and perhaps less desirable.

Overall, families at IAC, on average, wait for 12 months for a placement. This is also the average for Heterosexual couples. Lesbian couples, on average, wait 10 months, and Gay male couples average an 11-month wait. These numbers often baffle people who assume that it means LGBT families have an advantage over heterosexual couples. Some families may have a shorter wait, but it is not because of their sexual orientation.

Sexual orientation has nothing to do with the discrepancy in the wait time. Instead, how open couples are on their profile in regards to the race of the child, the mental health of the birthparents, and drug and alcohol use of the birthmother is the factor with the greatest influence on wait time. On average, Lesbian couples are the most open in regards to the race of the child and the mental health of the birthparents. When I compared Heterosexual couples that had the same level of openness as the average Lesbian couple they had the same wait time of 10 months. Furthermore, LGBT families who have the same level of openness as the average Heterosexual couple had the same wait time of 12 months.

LGBT families do not have a longer wait time for an adoptive placement. Birthparents choose the adoptive parents for their children based on many factors, but clearly, sexual orientation is not one of them.