It’s not uncommon for TV shows to throw in a surprise twist for their season finale. The same could be said of the ABC hit comedy Modern Family a couple weeks ago. The episode brought the adoption storyline of Cam and Mitchell back to life as the two received notice from their adoption agency that a birthmother had selected them. It also turned out that she had gone into early labor that day. Cam and Mitchell work their way to the hospital on the other side of town, some comedy ensues, and the episode ends on a sour note for them when the birth-grandmother decides to raise the child at the last moment. The decision is devastating for the couple.

As an adoption agency ourselves, we thought we would take a closer look inside this episode’s adoption storyline to give people some further insight as to when and how often this kind of situation happens.

First, at the Independent Adoption Center we have the “Last Minute Hospital List”: a list of adoptive parents ready to be considered in cases where a birthmother decides on adoption while giving birth at the hospital. We send a counselor to the hospital along with the adoptive parents letters for the mother to read through and make her decision. We have even had cases where the birthmother wasn’t aware she was pregnant until she was going into labor. We’ve seen many cases where adoptive parents are notified the day of birth, but haven’t yet seen a situation involving such a close resemblance to a Mexican Soap Opera.

While there are incidences of a birthmother changing her mind at the hospital, this is actually pretty rare. Only about 2% of birthmother’s decide to parent after initially placing their child in an open adoption. Much of the counseling we provide to birthparents is geared towards helping them figure out the best choice for them and their baby. This helps keep to a minimum the chance of a last-minute change of heart, because those birthparents who have a desire to parent are pointed towards resources to help them do so.

We were glad to see the adoption storyline back on Modern Family for this season’s finale. Be sure to keep tuned to our blog for more insight into how adoption scenarios are portrayed on TV and in movies.

Night Out! is an annual event celebrating the work of those involved with OFC. This year’s event takes place on Thursday, April 19 from 6-9pm at the Parc 55 Hotel in downtown San Francisco. Tickets are available for $125 and include cocktails & wine, a sit-down dinner, silent auction, and the comedian, Marga Gomez as MC.

As an LGBT friendly adoption agency that helps create culturally and ethnically diverse families, we do all we can to encourage the continued success OFC’s programs and events. Come join us in celebration of Our Family Coalition and their efforts to make the San Francisco Bay Area a supportive and fabulous community for LGBT parents and their children.

To learn more about Our Family Coalition visit their website or follow them on Facebook.

The article highlights a recent research report released by the Evan B. Donaldson Institute (http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/index.php) finding that California, Texas, New York, and Massachusetts have the largest number of gay and lesbian family adoptions. It is important to note that California, Texas, and New York are also the most populous states, which may explain the larger number of adoptions in these states regardless of the sexual orientation of the adoptive parents. Florida is the fourth most populous state, but does not have a large number of gay or lesbian adoptions because of a 30-year ban on the practice that the courts overturned last year. The Evan B. Donaldson Institute report also found that 60% of the agencies they surveyed accept applications from gay male and lesbian families seeking to adopt.

In 2010 IAC earned HRC’s “All Children – All Families” seal for best practices in LGBT adoption. HRC is the nation’s largest civil rights organization working for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender equity. See the ad displayed here:

Bo and Tom built their family through both international and domestic adoption. They talk about both adoptions in the article. Their older son is from Guatemala, and their younger son was born in Texas. They highlight the open relationship they have with their youngest son’s birth mother.

In addition, they talk about their relationship, their work, and why marriage equality is so important to their family. Bo and Tom are both cheerleading coaches for Radford High School, and they explain how their jobs have prepared them for parenting by teaching them how to connect to young people. This is clearly a strong point for this couple as the Radford Cheerleaders just won their sixth consecutive state championship.

The article has beautiful photos of Bo and Tom and their sons. In addition, there is a photo gallery of additional photos taken during the photo shoot with the family.

According to the Family Equality Council, “One in four children in this country is being raised by a single parent. Two million children are being raised in LGBT households. We all recognize there is no single type of family in America anymore. We must not allow anyone to place politics ahead of the best interests of children and exclude millions of potential parents because of who they are or whom they love.” (See: http://www.familyequality.org/site/PageServer?pagename=ECDF)

There is significant research that shows children raised in LGBT families have the same or better outcomes than children raised by heterosexual parents. As a result, large numbers of organizations have policy statements that support LGBT adoption and foster care including, The American Academy of Family Physicians, The American Academy of Pediatrics, The American Psychiatric Association, the National Association of Social Workers, and many others. For a complete list of these organizations and ones that support the Every Child Deserves a Family Bill see the list on the web site of PFLAG: http://community.pflag.org/page.aspx?pid=1411

The Independent Adoption Center is one of the child welfare agencies listed on this page supporting the bill. IAC has never had any discriminatory policies regarding adoptive parents including, sexual orientation, gender identity, marital status, religion, race, or ethnic background.

According to a statement issued by Tom Mann, Board Chairman of Equality Arizona, “SB 1188 takes the focus off of what’s in the best interest of the child when adoption decisions should be made on a case-by-case basis, according to what’s in a child’s best interest. Each case is unique. . . The only consideration should be determining what’s in the best interest of the child.

There is considerable research showing children raised by lesbian or gay parents have the same or better outcomes than children raised by heterosexual parents. The IAC does not discriminate against adoptive parents based on sexual orientation, marital status, religion, race, or any other reason.

For more on this topic read these posts:
Gay and Lesbian Parents Raise Well-Adjusted Children: IAC Families Participate in Groundbreaking Study
Son of Lesbian Mothers Speaks Out Against Iowa’s Legislation to Ban Gay Marriage

According to the Huffington Post, “The legislation, which was sponsored by Democratic Sen. David Koehler, would have amended the state’s recently passed civil unions law and allowed religious child welfare agencies to ‘decline an adoption or foster family home application’ to a couple in a civil union if ‘acceptance of that application would constitute a violation of the organization’s sincerely held religious beliefs.’” Read the full article posted on April 13, 2011 to the Huffington Post.

The IAC opposes any law that discriminates against potential adoptive parents for any reason, including sexual orientation, marital status, religion, and race.

For more on this topic read our posts on same sex adoption in Florida:

• LGBT Adoption Legal in Florida
• Florida Appeals Court Confirms Ban on Gay and Lesbian Adoption Unconstitutional
• Arkansas Ban on Same Sex Adoptions Ruled Unconstitutional

According to the opinion written by Associate Justice Robert Brown, the law “directly and substantially burdens the privacy rights” of both opposite- sex and same-sex couples. Judge Brown further wrote, “The choice imposed on cohabiting sexual partners, whether heterosexual or homosexual, is dramatic. They must chose either to lead a life of private, sexual intimacy with a partner without the opportunity to adopt or foster children or forego sexual cohabitation and, thereby, attain eligibility to adopt or foster.” There are no further appeals for this lawsuit. The Arkansas Supreme Court is the final appeal for the state constitutional issues disputed in this case.

IAC applauds this ruling. IAC opposes all laws that discriminate against LGBT families in adoption. The organization also opposes other discriminatory policies in adoption, including discrimination against single parents, and couples who are not married.

For more on this topic read our posts on same sex adoption in Florida:

• LGBT Adoption Legal in Florida
• Florida Appeals Court Confirms Ban on Gay and Lesbian Adoption Unconstitutional

Having placed about 1000 infants with LGBT families over the course of 29 years, the Independent Adoption Center has been involved in numerous studies and has a lot of information to offer on this topic. Wrixon urges all same-sex families hoping to adopt that even if they aren’t going to adopt through the IAC, they can feel welcome to call and have their questions answered.

*Ten Percent, a weekly interview series that focuses on lesbian, bisexual, gay and transgender (LGBT) issues, is a half-hour show created and hosted by long-time San Francisco media professional David Perry.

For more reading on LGBT adoption and same sex parenting read the following posts:

1. LGBT Adoption Legal in Florida
2. Wait Times for Adoptive Placements in LGBT Families
3. Gay and Lesbian Parents Raise Well-Adjusted Children: IAC Families Participate in Groundbreaking Study
4. IAC Recognized by Human Rights Campaign for Best Practices with LGBT Families
5. Son of Lesbian Mothers Speaks Out Against Iowa’s Legislation to Ban Gay Marriage