I am a grandparent and I did not know there was going to be an adoption of any kind. Am I allowed to send cards to the child thru the adoptive family?

First, it is wonderful that you want to have a connection to your birth grandchild. This is the best possible situation for the child, as there cannot be too many people who love them.

I would first speak to you daughter or son about what type of relationship she or he has with the adoptive family. I hope she or he says they have an open relationship. If so, ask her or him if the family would welcome a card. If she or he doesn't know you can ask her or him if you can contact them and ask. I hope the family would say, yes, as this would be in the best interest of their child.

If for some reason the family says they do not want cards, I encourage you to keep the cards that you would send every year. It is very likely that at some point when the child is older they will look for their birth family, and find you. It would be extremely important to them to have proof that you loved and cared for them throughout their childhood, even if you could not
have direct contact.